The reward for good husbands and fathers

Assalamu alaykum
In the name of Allah, Most Gracious Most
Merciful
Allah says in the Glorious Qur’an:
“And live with [them] in a beautiful
manner. If you are then displeased with
them, [then know] perhaps you like
something which Allah has created
abundant goodness in it (al-Qur’an4:19 )
.
The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him
peace) said:
The believer with the most perfect faith is
the one who has best character and the
one who is kindest to his wife (Sahih
Muslim).
The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him
peace) said:
The believer should not harbor hatred
towards his wife. If he dislikes something
in her, then surely he will be pleased with
another quality in her (Sahih Muslim).
Shaykh Asharaf Ali Thanwi said, commenting
on the above verse:
“Brothers! when Allah has ordained these
rights for women, then who can change
them.
If a man fails to fulfill these rights, he will
be guilty of not upholding the rights of
the creation. Man should ponder over
how Allah has interceded on behalf of
women in the above verse.
While there may be many reasons for
being displeased with one’s wife, the
main reason is usually bad character—
this becomes a source of grief for the
husband.
Nevertheless, Allah has promised that
even this bad character can become a
means of attaining goodness—for He is
All-wise and capable of doing anything.
For example, she could bear you children
who become the means of your salvation
come qiyamah. Just ponder over how
clearly the rights of women are
emphasized in the above Qur’anic verse.”
The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him
peace) said:
The best of you is the one best to his
wife. I am the best among you to his wife
(Tirmidhi, Darimi).
'A’isha (Allah be pleased with her) relates that
a desert Arab came to the Prophet (Allah
bless him and give him peace) and remarked:
“Do you kiss your children, for we do
not?” The Prophet (Allah bless him and
give him peace) replied, “What can I do if
Allah has taken mercy out of your
heart?” ( Sahih al-Bukhari and Muslim)
Anas (Allah be pleased with him) relates that
the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him
peace) said:
“Whoever brings up and nurtures two
young girls until they reach maturity will
appear on the Day of Judgment in a state
that he and I will be like this (and he
joined his fingers together).” [( Sahih
Muslim)]
It is easy to gauge from here how Islam has
granted so many incentives upon actions
necessary for the upkeep of society.
The Spiritual Care of One’s Family
Furthermore, just as it is necessary and
rewarding to see to the physical and monetary
needs of one’s family it is even more
important and rewarding to see to their
spiritual ( ruhani ) development.
Allah says in the Glorious Qur’an:
“O people of faith, save yourself and your
families from the Hellfire.” (al-
Qur’an66:6)
Likewise, the rewards for a women are also
many if she interacts well with her husband.
The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him
peace) said in a hadith narrated by Umm
Salama (Allah be pleased with him):
“Any woman who dies with her husband
pleased with her shall enter
Paradise .” (Sunan al-Tirmidhi)
The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him
peace) said in a hadith narrated by Anas
radhiyallahu anhu:
“If a women performs her five prayers,
fasts the month of Ramadan, protects
herself from immorality, and is obedient
to her husband, she will enter into
Paradise from any door she
desires.” ( Hilya)
It is greatly rewarding to treat all the creation
of Allah with gentleness and kindness. This
reward (along with the responsibility) only
increases when their is kinship and closeness.
This makes the person into a complete
believer, and he is rewarded in this life and the
Hereafter.
Much of the above information was gleaned
from Ashraf’s Advice on Marriage available
from www.al-rashad.com and the Mishkat al-
Masabih, the great hadith collection by
‘Allama Tabrizi in Arabic.
This is just a sample of what rich heritage we
have been left by our pious predecessors.
Other marriage books and relevant chapters in
hadith works like the Riyad al-Salihin
(translated) and the al-Adab al-Mufrad by
Imam Bukhari (translated) can be consulted
for more information.
Wassalam